Monday, May 02, 2011

I can't say anything new

about the death of "that man," as a friend put it so well.

But needless to say the past 25 hours have been weird. I didn't sleep a lot last night, mainly because I was thinking back to the horrific events of almost 10 years ago.

I lived in New York City for three and a half years - I went to college there. I didn't go "home" during the summers; I lived there year-round. So when 9/11 happened, three and a half years after I moved back to the West coast, after the disbelief passed, it was like someone had blown up my home. Like someone had ripped out my heart.

For my friends that live there, it was like someone had ripped out their guts.

The past day's events have made me think about all kinds of stuff from that time - the months of flinching every time the phone rang, every time I saw a plane flying low. The months of nightmares that I was running from buildings falling down. The F16s flying over my house at night. The realization that the shops and cafes I used to hang out at, with my ex who worked downtown, were charred and gone and that somewhere among the ashes, there had been people. Flying in and reconstructing the skyline in my mind. Carrying a portable radio in my car.

And the few weeks of general kindness right after it all happened.

I went to get mashed potatoes at KFC; the checker said, "God bless you."

We were overwhelmed by generosity for the survivors and their families.

We tread lighter. We realized that most of the daily bullshit was unimportant.

That couldn't last - but why can't we have it back? Why not channel that deep-seated human compassion and goodness and kindness and live like that every day? Why does it have to take a tragedy?

Maybe, one day, it won't. What if we channeled that energy and ended hunger and suffering around the world?

Just because we choose not to do it doesn't mean it's impossible.


themajessty said...

Amen to that.

A Beer for the Shower said...

Couldn't agree with you more.

Lynn said...

After 9/11 I didn't even want to honk my horn to alert a driver in front of the that the light had changed for fear of jangling our nerves. We were kinder to each other then and I miss that.

Good question - why couldn't we channel that?

LL Cool Joe said...

Yeah why is it that we need something awful to happen before we seem to unite as a nation?

Riot Kitty said...

Good question, but I don't know the answer...wish I did!

Full-On-Forward said...

Amen and Love from here!



In 10 more years this too will be a faded memory--life just works that way! Sometimes life Sucks- Sometimes- Not so much!

Riot Kitty said...

John: Thanks - and hugs back :)

Granny Annie said...

You have expressed yourself so well in this post and spoken for all. Thanks RK. Many people already find this as a faded memory and that is the shame. That is the reason there will always be wolves in sheep's clothing to lead the flock into the shadows of hate. I feel the pain of New Yorkers and I feel my own painful and shocking memories of that day. We were attacked in all our homes on 9/11 and the death of Usama Bin Laden is only a small piece of a huge terrorist puzzle.

Eeshie said...

You love New York, eh? Well that's funny, because I LIVE IN NYC! OH YEAH BABY! OH YEAH!



Riot Kitty said...

GA: Thanks so much...and so true about the puzzle.
Eeshie: Right on!

Darth Weasel said...

makes you wonder what people like Toby mendenhall are thinking.

And how, exactly, was that killing "murder"? He is clearly out of touch with reality.

Riot Kitty said...

Darth: I have to go look up who that is!

Green Tea said...

Excellent post kitty..When I get my old faithful back will post again..
I have my doubts if we can ever unite as a nation..Seems no matter what Obama isn't good enough for those that only see his color.