Saturday, April 25, 2009

Big mouth


Once more, the little social editor in my head is not working.

I visited with a friend twice on my California trip - and his inertia just started to get under my skin. He jokes about his "boring life" but makes no effort to do anything different...doesn't want to meet someone I think he might befriend, because it would "take time," doesn't want me and Pheromone Girl to try to think of ways to get his book (he's an author) out in front of people ("that would take time to talk to her about it"), etc.

So over lunch, I looked him right in the eye and said, "So if a gorgeous woman took you out on a great date and then offered to suck you off, would you say, 'Sorry, that would require me to spend time taking off my pants?'"

Without blinking, he says, "No - that's sex - that's different!"

He must not have been too offended because he bought lunch :)

15 comments:

Claire said...

Hee. Great story!

Cxx

LL Cool Joe said...

Of course he doesn't have to take his pants off to...

Sidhe said...

Ha! That guy sounds like someone I married...

Scarlet said...

Ha! How could he get offended?? You're honest, upfront and hilarious! :)

We don't need friends to feed us bs. I had coffee with a friend yesterday and it was so cool/refreshing to talk and joke around with someone who's totally real...and isn't easily offended.

Btw, she also bought me my coffee. :)

Fireblossom said...

First...that picture is priceless, I started my morning with a fine laugh as soon as I saw it. Big Mouth!

My father lived in SoCal for many years, and I never could get used to the laid back, laissez-faire ways.

You and Pheromone Girl both rock, I can't even imagine what your combined powers would be! ;-)

Grandpa Eddie said...

Of course he wasn't offended.
After all, it was sex you were talking about, and he is a friend.

Word Geek said...

"the little social editor in my head is not working."

Bwahahahaaaaaaaah!

I've got one of those. Mine PRETENDS to work, and then nips out for lunch at REALLY inopportune moments.

Honestly, you can't get the staff.

Good analogy, though. :)

skyewriter said...

Hi, Riot Kitty:
I have stopped by frequently and read along regularly. You are hi-larious and I love reading your razor-sharp wit.

You should buy your author friend a great (and funny) book by Ralph Keyes titled _The Courage to Write_. It is so spot on about the weird and overwhelming phobias unique only to writers (especially about the whole publishing nightmare).

Cheers!

Shionge said...

Hope lunch was good without him taking off his pants to pay for it *tongue in cheek*

:D

Oh.....after lunch I hope he stops lamenting that life is boring :D

listen for azure said...

Oh, you naughty girl. I would have killed to be a fly on the wall!!!

Aliceson said...

Men and their one track minds!

Riot Kitty said...

Thanks everybody :)

Skyewriter, I'll go check out your blog!

Darth Weasel said...

speaking of books...any update on BJP?

JLee said...

Men ALWAYS make time for sex. Every time. ha

Green tea said...

Do men ever think of anything else??