The haters have too much time on their hands

I love it how far-left or far-right groups choose nitpicky ridiculous shit to protest - 'cause it's far easier to do than actual do-gooding, like serving meals, spending time with a hopice patient, or volunteering your time somewhere.

Apparently there is an online group that had no problem when "Dancing with the Stars" (which I have never seen, btw, since I don't watch TV) has paraded stars whose pasts included posing for girly mags or making sex tapes - but OH MY! - they have their knickers in knots when a transgender man is a contestant on the show.

Personally, I don't give a shit who's on that show, and I think it takes a hell of a lot of guts to transition. Chaz Bono has not only transitioned, but he has done it publicly, as a role model and inspiration to a population that has one of the highest rates of suicides, suicide attempts, and survivors of sexual assault - way disproportionate compared to most of the population.

Onemillionmoms.com should think about how they'd feel if their children came out as trans. Would they still spread so much hate?

In the meantime...find something better to do. Protest the number of children that go to bed hungry in this country every night, for starters.

The hazards of working incognito

Mr. RK and I have our little traditions. One of them is that every day, we ask each other, "Did anything interesting or funny happen today?"

Here is Mr. RK's funny story of the day:

He is sitting outside, soaking up the sun (since he'd be happy if it was 109 every day, except we live in Oregon), and this guy comes out and sits next to him and starts talking.

Guy: "So yeah - my TV broke, but you know? I have a new perspective now that my girlfriend's pregnant. It doesn't matter anymore. I don't need to drive my fast car anymore."

Mr. RK thinks: "Who the fuck is this guy?!"

Then, suddenly, Mr. RK realizes it's P, a guy he has worked with for the past three weeks...except since they test electron microscopes, they are in bunny suits in a clean room.

So he didn't recognize P.

I imagine it's the same kind of hazard as you'd run into if you were a penguin.

I am off to nom my birthday cake

I am now officially in another demographic...I've left 18-34.

Yikes!

I have to say, recent events aside, the older I get, the happier I am.

That's pretty lucky.

It took me awhile after I grew up to realize that not everyone made as big a deal of birthdays as my family did. As my dad says, "Your birthday is the one day of the year when you should act as selfish as most people do every day."

I am off to do just that!

This would only happen to me!

I have a very large family.

So large, that apparently when someone dies, not everyone finds out.

So when someone else dies, I END UP SENDING A SYMPATHY CARD TO A DEAD PERSON.

Is there a more dysfunctional family than this? I can't imagine there is.

I sent this e-mail to extended family:

I know we are spread across the country, but would some of you PLEASE notify me when someone like Uncle L dies.

I sent him a sympathy card about Aunt L dying! And I am so sorry, Grandma, I would have sent you a card had I known.

As a friend of mine put it, "That would only happen to you!"

Another friend reminded me, "You are supposed to send sympathy cards to the survivors - not the person who died!"

And part 2 of the story of Dave

I heard part two of the story of Dave (see previous post) at a lunch meeting today.

All four of us ladies are pretty laid back. We asked whether Dave had managed to find any pants. My colleague said, "Did I ever tell you that Dave proposed to me a few years ago?"

Um, no.

Here's how it happened:

Dave was recovering in the ICU after open heart surgery. (Before you read the rest, keep in mind, he was on a morphine drip.)

He said, "Hey, L - I heard you don't have insurance. So why don't we get married?"

L: "Dave! You have Medicaid. That won't work."
Dave: "So you're turning down my proposal?"
L: "Yes."

Five minutes elapse. A nurse comes into the hospital room.

Dave: "L, wow, she's hot!" Dave turns toward the nurse. "Will you marry me?"

I swear I'm not making this up.

Happy almost Friday!

And you thought your day was strange

From a colleague's text today:

"Crazy day. Dog bit one of the volunteers and Dave refused to go anywhere with pants on."

Dave is another volunteer.

Don't you wish you worked in mental health advocacy?

More reasons I'm glad I'm not dating

So one of my friends decided to try a free online dating site.

Some of the guys who messaged her include:

Guy #1. His message to my friend: "So I keep bubble wrap under my mattress, so when I'm doing it, it sounds like fireworks are going off! Isn't that cool?"

Guy #2-10 (estimates) - Can't write proper English. I don't mean ESL - I mean they would flunk first-grade spelling tests. No one wants to get wicha, y'know?

Guy #11. His message to my friend: "So FYI, I have the stomach flu. This doesn't mean you have to wrap yourself in foil, you can't get it through the computer."

Um. Needless to say she didn't write any of these guys back...stomach flu man sent her eight other messages in about 10 minutes after she blocked him.

"Why aren't you responding? Hmm, I guess I'll have to keep trying to figure it out and maybe I'll never know..."

That's OK. The fact that he doesn't know speaks volumes!

My friend did meet someone nice - so far. I'll be back with a full report soon.