Friday, April 10, 2009

And the wanker of the week award goes to...

Trevor of Spokane, Wash.

Trevor was supposed to meet up with a friend of mine who met him online, after a few weeks of exchanging e-mails and talking.

He decided at the last minute to change the location of their meet-up (not an official date, mind you) because of ... a ... drum roll... game he wanted to watch!

Mind you, my biological mother once divorced a man because he left the game on their TV all weekend, every weekend...

So this, in my book, earns Trevor the wanker award.

But it gets better (wankier?)

He won't give my friend his address so they can meet. (Trevor: do you, like, live in the Smurf village or something? Up the bean stalk perhaps? Do you need to hide from the daylight, secretly being a vampire? Or do you live with someone already? Why the secrecy?)

She, being smart, sees a red flag and says forget it.

He, being an ass, e-mails her and says he is "really disappointed" and that she should "be ashamed of herself."

(Wankier and wankier...)

Then ... most pathetic and wankiest of all ... he e-mails here AGAIN and says, "Uh, if I give you my address, you still wanna go out?"

Don't think so!

So Trevor, this award is for you. You've earned it in oh so many ways.

- RK

PS This being my lunch break, I didn't think it was wise to search Google images for "wanker," so I will leave you with Tink instead.


Word Geek said...

Clap your hands if you believe in wankers!

Sidhe said...

He lives with his mom. Definitely a wanker.

I'm furiously clapping my hands!!!

Granny Annie said...

A "real man" would do everything to make the girl feel safe and secure and not worry about his information.......unless he's quite married or otherwise involved in a committed relationship.

Hey Michelle, sorry about my missing post and thanks for coming by. I deleted it so you're not crazy -- there had been something there:-)

Pouty Lips said...

He doesn't give out his address because he doesn't want anyone disturbing his wanking. Your friend needs to run, not walk, away from that jerkoff as fast as her legs will go.

Aliceson said...

Oh yeah, he lives in his mom's basement for sure. Your friend is a smart cookie to forget about this guy. Wanker, wanker, wanker!

Shionge said...

Now I must goggle wanker too kekekkek....

Yo...come to visit me in Singapore someday Rk - I'll show you around and would love to be your host :D

LL Cool Joe said...

Geez first of all I thought this was a post about me! :D

After reading your post I realised it wasn't because I give out my address to complete strangers all the time. Unfortunately no ones that interested. :D Maybe that just makes me a sad desperate wanker.

Scarlet said...

"Wanker of the Week..." I can think of more than one for this week.

This should be a meme.

Anonymous said...

Ah, come on, don't you want to have your network folks have a good time seeing "wanker" listed on their logs?

Darth Weasel said...

I hate to say it, but I suspect living in his basement with his mother is probably the BEST possible locale. People with nothing to hide have no fear of divulging their address. If she were foolish enough to meet him after that, check for tan lines on the fourth finger of his left hand. Just sayin'

pheromone girl said...

*the sound of clapping*

I REALLY did leave that as a comment before. Really.

Now, everybody go count the number of times we all said WANKER!!

And watch for the infamous Wanker Award coming to a blog near you!!

ZIRGAR said...

Amazing. I think this subspecies of homo sapiens is called homo jerkofficus. I believe that's the correct scientific terminology. The best way to spot one is by it's shifty eyes (darting back and forth furiously), also a slight frothing of saliva in both corners of its mouth, greay hair, ususally along with toilet paper adhering to the heel of its naked foot or shoe. Often only speaking in sentence fragments this subspecies is perfect for speaking at GOP fundraisers and CPAC conferences. BEWARE!

Seriouly, this guy needs to be tossed on the heap and forgotten about. What a loser.