Saturday, June 18, 2011
Mr. RK's Guide to Boys
So every time I go with Mr. RK to a particular restaurant, one of the guys who works there - his family owns it - scurries around like a mouse and hardly says anything to us. But when I am there with female friends, he never shuts up.
We went there for brunch this morning and he hardly said two words to us. So, driving back home, I asked Mr. RK, "Why would he be so quiet around you, and so talkative when you're not there."
"N from work wouldn't say the stuff she says to me if you were there," he replied. "N" is a raunchy woman who is the age of Mr. RK's mom.
"But," I noted, "N wants to get in your pants. This guy is a dozen years younger than my friend L and I. I'm sure he doesn't want to get into our pants."
"How old is he?" Mr. RK asked. "21 or 22? He wants to get in everyone's pants!"
Mr. RK continued to present his Guide to Boys, which is outlined here:
When you're 15, you just want a good magazine.
When you're 17-33, you just want to get into the pants of anyone of your gender of preference who is breathing.
At around age 33, you become more discriminating.
(Good thing, then, that I met Mr. RK when he was 33.)
So, boys, I ask: is this true?