Friday, December 10, 2010
Random funny things from this week
Working on our annual appeal at work, I found out we have a member named Harold Furry. And one named Forest Byrd.
A moment at Mr. RK's work. His boss has a voice that carries.
Boss to female employee: "So you got laid last night?"
Like a movie, everyone becomes silent.
Boss: "Hey, she looked happy!"
Funny but creepy - it's a first. I have never gotten hit on by someone delivering our water at work. How's this for a bad pickup line?
Guy: "Ooooooooh cookies! (Munching.)I bet your husband thinks you're the bomb because you make such good cookies!"
Me: "Yes, he does. He ate several of them last night."
Guy: "Uh. I bet you make good Christmas cookies, too?"
Before rubbing my velveteen shirt sleeve and saying, "Oooh, this reminds me of those red velvet seats they used to have in theaters!"
Where you probably jerked off also. OK, the funniest bit was that line in my head, wasn't it?
Seeing an e-mail that I sent a few of you about an angel who gets a tree shoved up its ass by a pissed-off Santa. A friend who volunteers e-mailed me in a separate e-mail and said, "See you tomorrow, my little angel!"
Stuffing condoms into holiday gift bags with several older volunteers, it suddenly turned into a hilarious hen house.
Woman #1: "If all of these get used, it really will be a happy holiday!"
Funny but sad (not to mention stupid): a county a few hours south of here spent $250K advertising that they were broke. No kidding.
My friend coming up with a great line about people whose IQs equal their shoe sizes.