Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Things I want to know - Top 10 Tuesday


Joey reminded me that I haven't done a Top 10 Tuesday for awhile. Here are 10 things I want to know.

1. Who thinks *inside* the box? Styrofoam packing peanuts?

2. What bright person thought up the plastic sticky twist-tie type thing on packaging for bread, that you nearly tear your skin off to get open, then can't close? And why do they call it "easy open"? I ask you.

3. Why were mosquitoes invented? Do they actually serve an ecological purpose? Or was God just angry that day?

4. Who (or what) determines the sizes of condoms? Do they even sell "small"? I've never seen anything smaller than "medium."

5. If each condom is tested individually...how? By what or by whom?

6. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a neocon's brain? Mr. RK asks.

7. Who decided that sci-fi characters and superheroes have to wear lycra suits? Doesn't that get hot? (Or, Mr. RK asks, embarrassing at the nude beach?)

8. Starbucks is coming out with a 31-ounce drink. I predict a mad rush to bathrooms after the morning commute. What I want to know - who needs that much coffee, anyway?

9. Why is it that people think cute and cuddly equates soft and furry? I have known some pretty tough koala bears in my lifetime, and some very friendly lizards. (Can you tell Mr. RK is sitting here with me?)

10. Why don't people who say they are "tea bagging" get the porn reference? Actually they can keep not getting it...

16 comments:

Fireblossom said...

Mr. RK asks very odd questions.

Darth Weasel said...

re no 8: Long-haul truckers, for decades and decades, are famous for packing thermoses of coffee for their long hauls. I know Dad would drink 5 or 6 cups of coffee when we stopped, then get a thermos which would get refilled when he stopped for fuel.

I assume he is not unusual and that truckers drink gallons of the stuff...though not expensive stuff like Starbucks.

Oh, and in a completely unrelated note, no matter how much you love Mt. Dew, if you are traveling a lonesome road sometime, somewhere, and see a free Mt Dew bottle lying beside the road, still full...I gently suggest, gentle reader, that you not partake of it. Never did it, never saw it done, but that coffee had to go somewhere..and I have heard tales.

Claire said...

You always make me laugh, sweetie. GREAT post!

Cxx

Lynn said...

No 8 - my brother in law. I've never seen anyone drink so much coffee. All day and all evening. And then sleeps. Incredible.

LOL at Darth and the Mountain Dew. :)

skyewriter said...

RE 6: See 1.
Many, many licks to get through the cardboard exterior to realize they have nothing but packing peanuts for brains... and are always thinking inside the box.

Eww.. thinking of licking a Republican just made me throw up in my mouth a little...

Logical Libby said...

Pretty sure all condoms are the same size. They just put them in different boxes.

Holland said...

No 3. is so true (bitches get to me every time... so I could regard it as punishment for things I've done/didn't do)
and no. 4 is ... well... disturbing....LOL

Senorita said...

You make my brain spin with such questions !

G. B. Miller said...

#10. Sad to admit, I didn't get the porn reference until a fellow blogger thoughtfully posted a link to the Wikipedia definition.

.........

I now use that phrase somewhere in my latest story.

mac said...

I think the whole teabagging movement started with a freudian slip. They know, but are too chicken-shit to admit it. And, they secretly desire it.

All condoms are small. They just put a different label on them to make us feel special. The actual sizes are small, extra small, and OMG it's such a cute li'l fella.

The testers?
Leaders of the teabaggers.

Riot Kitty said...

Everyone: LMAO! Thanks!

Ileana said...

LOL - You're on a roll, Chica!

About the coffee...I put two shots of espresso in my milk every morning and I'm wired ALL DAY. I can't imagine what a 31-ounce cup would do to me...but I've always liked those HUGE coffee cups that look like soup bowls. Pretty, but deadly.

LL Cool Joe said...

I can't understand why any one would drink a small coffee in Starbucks, it all tastes like cats piss to me. And their hot chocolate is so weak I'm wondering if they put any chocolate in it at all.

Riot Kitty said...

Ily: I can't even do that much caffeine, or I turn into the bionic woman!
Joey: LMAO!

Mike_D said...

Technically, #7 is because a comic book male or female figure is easier to draw nekkid, so I guess spandex is the easiest way around this...

#2: Any guy will tell you after you take off the annoying plasticy thing around bread, you just take the open bread bag and spin it.

Oh, and courtesy of Calvin and Hobbes: Who decided they would just decide to drink whatever came out of that cow over there?

Mountain Dew is a spectacular drink. The dew of the Gods, if you will.

Unknown said...

#5.) UGH. Will never look at one the same way.