Tuesday, November 17, 2009

How many people does it take to irritate a Riot Kitty?

Not many, if they are REALLY irritating.

My first e-mail of the day at work, from a member of our walk committee:

Hi RK,
The people who put on the "Race For the Cure" have a catagory (her spelling, not mine) called "Sleep for the Cure". I thought we could have a catagory called "Sleep Walk for (our organization)" or "Sleep Walking for (our organization)" in which a person would sign up for the walk and tell their sponsors that they can't walk that day, but they are earning money by sleeping in that day (or something like that). What do you think?

*What do I think? I think you are in need of our services. What a great way to eliminate the stigma of mental illness: ask people to pay us to sleep! Or even better, to sleepwalk!*

Coming back from lunch, I almost get run over in our own parking lot by a guy who gave me an apologetic, shit-eating grin. I gave him the snake eyes, walked into my office, and said, "Some asshole almost ran me over in the parking lot."

Guess who walked in a minute later for a meeting with my boss?

During this meeting, a person who runs a support group for us - God knows how she made it through the screening, because she's irritating, a pain in the ass, a troublemaker, and convinced the world is out to get her - walked in to pick up some brochures. And sat. And sat and sat waiting, in the same room where my boss was having his private meeting, for over an hour.

Guess who wouldn't leave?
Guess who kept making stupid comments, requesting materials, and just about demanded a fucking security blanket? On the plus side, it was amusing to see her talking to (at) my boss, because he's 6'4", and she is under 5'. The little annoying shrew meets the Jolly Green Giant. He was wearing a green sweater, too.

Then we get a helpline e-mail from a couple in Ohio who have a son in Portland who is staying with their other son. He needs Medicaid, housing, and meds RIGHT NOW, and we need to figure this out for him because they can't or won't. Um, anything else? World peace? The lottery, perhaps?

I ask a colleague at one of our chapters to give a quick glance to a simple power point presentation I prepared for our volunteers to get people involved. In response, I get a 500-word, nitpicky-as-hell critique including the question - and I kid you not - "Can you use a picture of an iris instead of a picture of a daffodil on slide # 6?"


And so this is one of those days where I would love to go run all of this stuff out, but I can't because it's already pitch black out, even though it's not 6 p.m.

I'm excited, though, because my rolling pin and pasta maker are in the mail. So the next time I have a day like this I can take it out on the dough and make linguine!


Lil Red said...

I don't know what's worse...almost getting run over or putting up with all the bullshit afterwards. Wow!

You need to bring that rolling pin to work with you and use it when necessary!

Darth Weasel said...

Let us say it together..."Ilove people" :-)

And to think, so much of what you experienced seemed like a good idea in their head.;.;

Lynn said...

That sounds like a great plan to me, RK!

Aliceson said...

It's days like this that have me asking "what planet are these people from?" Really an iris over a daffodil is going to make the presentation that much better? WTF!

And the whole asshole in the parking lot thing has burned me too. A realtor we dealt with a few years ago stole my spot in the parking lot (we hadn't met yet) and I gave him the go to hell stink eye. When we finally met, I felt bad but soon realized that he was in fact a first rate A-hole.

Claire said...

Oh man. I recommend merlot!


LL Cool Joe said...

I agree with Claire!

"Can you use a picture of an iris instead of a picture of a daffodil on slide # 6?"

You are kidding me, right? And don't forget one petal has to have a small bee on it collecting nectar?

JLee said...

Wow, I thought my job was irritating. Well, it is, but so is yours! lol

G said...

And whoever says you aren't a people person, should be drawn and quartered.

As for the e-mail from your "wonderful" co-worker, did you have an Al Jaffee Snappy Answer to it?

Isn't it great working with toddlers?

Shionge said...

I get some shitty days like your too RK and yes, I agreed with Lil Red, bring that rolling pin to work and when you are done....send them to me heheheh..

Hope you are feeling better now pal :D

Michelle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Riot Kitty said...

LR: Good idea about the rolling pin!
Darth: Riiiiiiiiiight...
Lynn: I'll keep you posted ;)
Aliceson: WTF is right!
Claire: Ah, if only I hadn't quit drinking ;)
Joey: Nectar and the bee! I knew I forgot something!
G: LMAO about that first line. I did write her back and tell her I was looking for quick feedback and not a book, and then she got all defensive. Oh well ;)
S: Send them to you? You're too nice for that! Today was better because I took the day off :)

Passion Fruit said...

Impressively optimistic ending - 'I'm excited, though'.