My younger brother B. was visiting last week, and when we had a cat emergency, he was very nice and came with me to the kitty ER, and then to the follow up appointment with my regular vet. Mandrake was so doped up on his pain meds that he peed all over B., who shrugged and said, "At least it's not my own!"
He then proceeded to keep watch on Mandrake when I was at work, texting me when and where he peed, poor kid. So as a thank you, I took him to see a movie I really didn't want to see.
Mind you, I am not a prude. I like Seth Rogen. But this movie, beyond a few funny (albeit disgustingly funny) moments, was not my cup of java. It was scary in that it was so over the top I kept thinking, "Oh fuck! I took my little brother to see this?"
My dad emailed me: "Your brother N. said it was superb! What was it about?"
Note to self: N.'s taste has obviously degenerated suddenly.
I wrote back: "In a nutshell, imagine some jokes about jerking off, seeing way too much of Michael Cera, Jonah Hill gets literally screwed by a demon, and a 100-foot-tall Lucifer with a huge, bouncing dick spitting fire all over the city of Los Angeles in an apocalypse."
He didn't write back. Later, I asked him if he was offended.
"No, I thought you were joking."
Me: "As if I could make that up! I'm not that creative."
The only person in the movie I wouldn't have minded seeing naked (guess who) doesn't get anywhere near naked. As an aside, he was two years behind me at my high school. People who find out where I grew up invariably ask me, "Did you know him?" And I say, "Of course not! He was two years younger. As if we would have given him the time of day." Eeew.
Meanwhile, Mr. RK was challenged to do karaoke by a coworker. He replied that he didn't sing. The coworker told him he could rap.
Mr. RK said, "I cannot deceive you when I say that I enjoy large posteriors."
If you don't get that reference, I feel very old.
(And just for the record, I have no butt to speak of, and he's just fine with that.)
23 comments:
OK, I don't know what movie you went to see, but it sounds like one of those Scary Movie sequels. That's all that comes to mind. Either that or one of the millions of stupid Adam Sandler movies that come out every month. OK, I'm going to have to Google and find out what movie this was.
I am assuming the movie was that NEW one with that whole group of guys that like to make films together. I really hate most of those films---They are stupid and over the top, disgusting-wise, and I am not a prude....But, these films make me feel like protesting and picketing against this horrible bathroom-type humor. I don't think any of that stuff is funny, at all!
Who is it among those guys you would like to see naked??? Email me...
I hope your dear Mandrake gets better and better, very very quickly....Poor sweetheart! How wonderful of your brother to help you and Mandrake out in this truly generous and loving way...!
I wanted to see this movie so I skipped your post.
Video games are an art form though! Seriously, I can go onto this long spiel explaining everything if you want and give examples of games I would consider art.
Yeah, there are terrible ones out there *cough*callofduty*cough* but just like books or music, not everything that gets released is good.
There's always time for Sir-Mix-A-Lot!
I haven't seen "This is the End" but My Rare One went to it with a friend and said it was hilarious. Of course, she'll laugh at anything which is why my jokes always go over so well with her.
P.S. I hope poor Mandrake feels better soon. Is it "teh crystals"?
"You don't have to sing, you can rap". That killed me!
You should think about pitching movie stories for a living; excellent one sentence summary of that movie. How hard could it be?
I saw "Pineapple Express" and thought it was poop. Even James Franco couldn't save it for me. This movie is by the same people, I think. Guess I'll skip it. But I am impressed you e-mailed "huge bouncing dick" to your father.
And I'm too old to not get the rap reference.
Large posteriors. LOL. I know what this movie is. Have yet to see a Seth Rogan film I liked, I'm afraid.
Thanks for the info. I hadn't heard of this movie but I am pretty tired of all the stupid, fart joke, drunk themed, bathroom humor fare of movie. Once in awhile there is a laugh but most are pretty forgettable.
Steve: It's in the post...This is The End. Dumb title too!
Naomi: James Franco! I'll email you too ;)
DW: You can do the spiel, I am interested.
Claire: Cheers!
Deborah: Must be nice having a partner like that! There were some hilariously disgusting moments. As for Mandrake, it's "idiopathic" (meaning they don't know.) Thanks for asking :) He is feeling much better.
Dexter: Why, thank you!
Abby: I haven't seen Pineapple Express. I probably would if James Franco was naked in it. But yeah, my dad is pretty laid back.
Charles: I like him to an extent, but I don't know that I like his movies overall.
Cheryl: Well...these were memorable in the way of "I now need some mental bleach."
I think I'll avoid the movie thanks. :D
It's harder to rap well than sing.
Talking of rappers I'm sorry to hear about man"drake", I hope he gets better very soon!
I know what that's like. There are so many people I want to see naked but they never get anywhere near naked. ;)
I'm not a prude, either...but some (read "a lot") of these movies...so-called comedies like the one you've just described, leave me cold...very cold!
I do so hope that Mandrake is on a speedy return to recovery. :)
Joey: Good call. And I am sure he's feeling better now that he knows he has a mature, rap cat name ;)
Blue: Exactly!! We see too many that should NEVER go without clothing but the good ones...sigh.
Lee: Exactly. Meh. Thank you! He is doing well now.
one thing to say: OMG!
My niece and her bridesmaids danced to that song at her wedding reception. (They feel that they can relate to the posterior references in that song, but they all work out.) :)
I will not see that film and, in fact, had never heard of it.
IA: Seriously!
Lynn: That's hilarious!
Shared this post with my son this weekend. He laughed and laughed. He had seen the movie in question and totally agreed with you and he is certainly not a prude. I did know about the posterior song from watching FRIENDS on TV.
Hey, I got that reference, and I'm still in my 20s. Clinging to them by a thread, but, still.
Also, I've heard nothing but good things about This is the End. Is that just a sign that all of my friends are immature man-children?
I had not even heard of this movie until I read this post. Yikes! But who am I to judge? I have been watching "Orange is the New Black" on Netflix and holy shit! It leaves little to the imagination.
GA: Good to hear from you! Glad it's not only me. What do you think of the song? :)
ABTFS: Cheers! And yes, probably, because my brothers both liked it.
Birdie: I haven't seen that, should I check it out?
P.S. Poor kitty cat.
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