Thursday, February 28, 2013

There's a reason the villain has a twirly moustache

A few posts ago, I wrote about the affectations of a moustachioed hipster I had to work with in the context of planning an event for work.

Now, this is a post for laughter - not for whining - but also to prove that, yes, it's true! The guy with the long moustaches is always the villain.

Yosemite Sam...


Bill the Butcher...

Snidely Whiplash...


The Purple Pie Man. You get the point.


I arrive and he fails to tell me there is a loading zone. He gets me a parking space that's the equivalent of several long city blocks away from the event space.

Now, if you're ever done events or even been to an event, you'll note that there are things to bring - in this case, packets of info, pens, fliers, etc. Which makes for a very heavy box.

Halfway to my destination from the faraway lot, thinking my arms are going to snap like twigs, I flag down a guy with a little cart and beg for help. (This, after several people who have seen me struggling to carry the box discreetly look away and keep walking.)

Luckily, he is the guy bringing the food to my event. (Note: the trays of food weigh less than my box, and he has a cart! I only have arms. How does this happen?)

I get there and Mr. Twirly Moustache, who was supposed to meet me, is a no-show. The signs that are supposed to be outside directing people to the event are also MIA.

And of course, I have left my phone in the car.

I run back and when I get there, my volunteers still aren't there - because there are no signs, and they're totally lost.

45 minutes after he is supposed to have met me, a pissed-off looking Mr. Twirly Moustache appears and tells me, "I dropped everything because I got a call that you wanted to see me!"

I ask him where the signs are.

"They got rained on."

Hello. This is the NORTHWEST,  in WINTER. There is rain virtually every day. Why didn't he put them in plastic?

Did I mention the room is also set up exactly the way I asked him not to set it up? And that they forgot to give us silverware?

I am not making this up. I wanted to unroll those windy moustaches and give them a good hard yank.

Fortunately, the event itself was a success and our members were happy, even if they had to eat with their fingers.

But the moral of the story is...if you see twirly moustaches, run. Don't say I didn't warn you.

23 comments:

The Elephant's Child said...

I love your humourous take on the event - but have taken it on myself to growl, hiss and spit on your behalf. Aaaah. I feel better for that.

DWei said...

Uh oh, I had a guy with a twirly mustache serve me food.

I hope nothing bad happened to it...

LL Cool Joe said...

Oh damn I was thinking of growing a twirly moustache! I thought it would add something unique to my look. :D

Didn't Salvador Dali have one? Was he a baddy too?

Granny Annie said...

So much for the mustache wax Ron wants me to order. Me thinks he had plans to twirl his mustache but I shall dash them:) Thanks for the warning.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Back in the day when I used to organize events, I always found that the volunteers who were the biggest talkers and made the biggest promises almost always proved to be the most unreliable.

Charles Gramlich said...

I better trim my mustache before it gets long enough to twirl!

Birdie said...

I once dated a guy that was growing a long moustache like Yosemite Sam. I fucking hated it. It always had shit it it and it made me want to barf. So, I broke up with him.

(Yes, there is more to the story and that wasn't the real reason I broke up with him but GAWD I hated that moustache! *gag*)

Cheryl said...

I know I have mentioned more than once that I would suck at your job. Consider this is yet another time, I am saying it.

I am going to totally take your word about the mustache warning. If I see any twirly mustache guys, I am going to assume the worst. You really should of just grabbed those and pulled. He deserved it.

G. B. Miller said...

And good good time was had by all. :D

On a semi-serious note, that volunteer sounded like my son.

Which is a very scary thought indeed.

Perhaps you should be wary of me, although I do not have a twirly mustache, I do have a modified Fu-Manchu.

Riot Kitty said...

He was STAFF at the place where we had the event. STAFF, I tell you! Which makes it all the more unprofessional, and unbelievable. Volunteer, I would have yanked moustaches.

Riot Kitty said...

BTW, Birdie - I wouldn't have gone near someone with a moustache like that. You don't even NEED another reason to have dumped him.

OldLady Of The Hills said...

Oh, Lord, what a nightmare! I have been involved in so very many BIG Events and everything you wrote about is very familiar, I'm sorry to say! ALL, but the moustache Person...lol....I fear if he had appeared at any of the events I was involved with, things would have been 10 times worse!

Darth Weasel said...

perhaps next time you can discreetly clip off just half of his upper lip hair...fair vengeance methinks

Riot Kitty said...

Yes, you both nailed it. Too bad we didn't bring scissors.

A Beer For The Shower said...

The twirly mustache is always a classic sign of a villain, and yet he's never really menacing, is he? No one's ever afraid of him. I've never seen a guy like this and thought, "Man, I wouldn't want to cross HIM in a back alley." I wonder why that is.

Rock Chef said...

Yes, over here a twirly moustache is used to indicate someone who is a "cad".

Riot Kitty said...

ABFTS: That is a very good point! I could probably have snapped him like a twig ;)
RC: Good to know!

Ileana said...

Oh I love the illustrations that drive your point home, chica! lol

I have yet to meet a man with a Salvador Dali moustache I could trust.

Introverted Art said...

I will stay away from twirly mustached men!

Riot Kitty said...

Ily: Ni yo.
IA: Good plan ;)

Shionge said...

Heheheh...my hubby has moustache buy not twirly...lucky lucky :D

Betty Manousos said...

thanks for the warning. lol!

but i am glad to hear the event was a success and that your members were happy.

and i love the illustrations you've posted here.

big hugs~

Lynn said...

What's with people with those twirly moustaches anyway? I don't get why they think that looks good. They must be hiding something there. :)

Clearly that guy was rude and inept. I wish you had given his moustache a yank!