Thursday, September 09, 2010

Today I Feel Like a Warm Fuzzy

No, that's not naughty - do you remember that book from the 70s?

I read and re-read that book at age 5 so that eventually the cover fell off. I think I still have it somewhere.

Basically, it was a sweet (OK, fuzzy) little feel-good life lessons book for kiddos. I remember always feeling good after I read it.

I thought about this book today after I had a couple of conversations with my dad. His parents are ailing and despite the fact that in my opinion, they were not very good parents or loving people, he has taken very good care of them in their old age. The visits are never fun, and they're expensive (in my opinion my grandfather tries to wheedle as much money as he can from him, and it pisses me off), but he still does his best to make sure they are comfortable.

Even when he's not around, he sends nice stuff. Every month he sends my grandmother a bouquet of flowers, because although she was once an avid gardner, she gets so depressed now that she doesn't go outside.

Anyhow, we were having a conversation about this the other day and he told me that both he and his sister think, based on their upbringing, that they are missing the emotion that tells them they are loved. Meaning, they don't know what that feels like, even though they know people love them.

That made me so sad! We all love him to bits but I suppose all I can do is tell him over and over.

Meanwhile, I was thinking: what makes me feel loved?

Today my car battery died and with no questions asked, Mr. RK drove across town, figured out the problem, figured out which store to go to so we'd spend less because it was under warranty, and fixed my car.

That's one example. How about you?


Fireblossom said...

I don't remember that book at all.

I know what makes me feel loved, but i am not about to write it here lol.

Logical Libby said...

My parents have always made me feel loved -- maybe because their parents never did. Maybe it was a generational thing... You know, the "asshole" generation.

Darth Weasel said...

good to have someone to take care of you.
I suspect "feeling loved" means different things to different people. For some it is very much about words and indescribably emotions...for others that means little but actions mean much.

I suspect there are varying degrees in between.

Mom and Dad were not great about words and feelings...but I never doubted the love they felt and as age has somewhat reversed our roles, the depth of conversations I am able to hold with him mean everything to me. A little out there I suppose...but it is, for me, a tremendous demonstration of familial love.

Riot Kitty said...

Libby: Mine too - I feel lucky. You're right, it is the asshole generation.
Darth: Good points. Actions should mean the most, methinks.

LL Cool Joe said...

When I was out with Gina the Interior designer in AZ, she said to me that she could see how my partner always wanted to please me and make me happy.

Quite honestly I hadn't even noticed, but after she said that, I knew she was right. It took an outsider to make me realise that I was in fact loved.

Scarlet Ily said...

In some ways I'm a lot like your father and Joey, I know people love me but I have no examples of how I know. Weird, huh?

Scarlet Ily said...

In some ways I'm a lot like your father and Joey, I know people love me but I have no examples of how I know. Weird, huh?

Boonie S said...

Interesting questions raised. Thanks for this.

All the best, Boonie

Shionge said...

Thanks for sharing RK and I suppose little things that our partner did for us spelt 'love'.

Lynn said...

Getting random calls from my mom, when she usually says "I just wanted to check on my girl!"

That was lovely of Mr. RK to do that for you.

JLee said...

Getting gifts from Bloggers :) That's one...

The other day my friend was getting out of my car and she spontaneously said "love you" and it was very heartwarming...

Riot Kitty said...

Joey: That's a sweet story!
Ily: As long as you know it :)
Boonie: Thanks!
S: True :)
L: That is sweet!
JLee: :) That is sweet, too.

Green Tea said...

I am sorry for those that can't feel the love..I am lucky..