Thursday, March 06, 2008

Keeping the candy shop open...




My husband figured out that I am the only wife among himself and his male coworkers who doesn't withhold sex (aka "the candy shop," as his coworkers call it) when pissed off. (Who am I kidding? I couldn't hold out that long anyhow. Toys can only do so much.)

Coworker #1's wife didn't hand any over for a month...until he stopped talking about wanting to buy a motorcycle. He figured this out on his own, mind you, she didn't connect the dots for him.

Coworker #2's wife didn't like a video that he brought home...they usually watch them together, and even go to strip clubs (Mr. Riot Kitty suspects they are both bi, incidentally), but apparently trans-on-trans porn wasn't up her alley. She also didn't say anything, but as Coworker #2 told my husband, "I went to the candy shop and it had turned into a dry cleaners."

Coworker #3 is simply a jackass...my husband suspects he was simply being himself too often.

But perhaps now we know a fix for all of this...

It's funny, because a friend of mine in college used to complain that his wife wouldn't give him any unless he was doing enough chores. She wasn't verbal about it, either...he just figured it out.

And did more chores.

Dear God, I hope my family doesn't read this!

5 comments:

Darth Weasel said...

bwoohahahahaha


I must admit though that the research in that article was shocking; men who are more considerate of their wives and take a more active role in family life receive more candy than guys who are inconsiderate and consider an active role in family life to be not drooling while watching monster truck rallies on television? I think someone is fudging the numbers

JLee said...

#1 is just wrong/manipulative. #2 is just plain weird. haha
I don't think you should use that as a weapon, but if I'm pissed off, I can't help it. I don't want it until it's resolved.

Riot Kitty said...

Oh don't get me wrong - if I'm upset forget it! But if I'm pissed off, I'm usually unable to prevent vocalizing it ;)

Misty said...

Ha. Love this post. Too funny. I will say I definitely want to open the candy shop more when hubby is helping..which he does help a lot! But i can see feeling less than excited about it if the hubby is just sitting around doing nothing!

Foster Communications said...

Too funny! Maybe I'm not like most women but I'm not all about closing down the candy shop either! I'm a big fan of the candy shop! Huge!