And just for the hell of it, because it made me howl with laughter and prompt a family member to see what the hell was going on, I'm including this amazing illustration from my friend She Who Seeks' blog post about Bunnies Behaving Badly. Don't you wish there was a Little Golden Book like this when you were growing up? Maybe I'll write one.
My words this week are ANNOYED. Because, once again, it's event season. Did I mention that I am the first person in this role who does not have a full-time assistant (no assistant at all, actually) for this event? Which is the largest one in our field of advocacy in our state? OCD works for me! Seriously, I told my boss everyone who has this job in the future will require that (my) diagnosis to get all of the details taken care of.
Some of the things going on daily...
1. People who have no business trying to register online expecting me to be their personal tech guru. Use a fucking paper form! Really, this is an option! You don't have to join the 21st, or even 20th, century for this event.
2. Said people bitching about why we can't make the website easier, telling me how they loved the last website, when they bitched about the last one too!
3. The same people emailing all of their team members about me, telling them I'll fix any technical support issue they have.
I truly love advocacy work, and I don't mind the fundraising. But for the love of God, I'm not IT!
So here are my words for Wednesday:
Shoo
Irritable
Bother
Whine
Voodoo
Scream
Fuck
Off
I am allowed six to a dozen, so there you have it.
20 comments:
This is a true story (except for the final statement)...no names have been changed to protect the innocent or the perpetrator!!
"If SHOOIRRITABLE was a real word, I would’ve been using it almost every minute over the past 24 hours or so. I’m feeling so, so irritable I want to SCREAM. I’ve been trying to shoo my irritability away, but because the cause is dependent on the actions of another, until the situation is rectified and back to normal the status quo shall remain.
I hate to WHINE. My motto is…why BOTHER other people with my mundane, insignificant problems; but FUCK it! If I had a VOODOO doll on hand I’d be sticking pins in it; and would continue doing so until my computer guy brings back my upgraded desktop tower. It was supposed to be back today, but he’s not even picked it up yet! He was supposed to pick it up yesterday and return it today.
Of course, I unplugged everything in readiness for his arrival!!
In the interim I’m forced to use my laptop that I very rarely use; and having large hands, as I do….I hate having to use this smaller keyboard!
Sho yes…I am shertainly shoo very irritable and have hit the Scotch bottle!!! Sho there!"
Glad you enjoyed that wannabe Little Golden Book!
Ummm....oh heck, where's my thinking cap. Shooirritable?
Nice one Lee, hope your computer guy gets a move on.
Like last week, whatever I come up with will be posted on my blog on Friday 15th.
http://river-driftingthroughlife.blogspot.com.au
I do admire you for your Event work. I would be beyond feral. Busy, tiring day today. I will think about using the words tomorrow.
Damn! Shoo and Irritable were formatted incorrectly...two separate words. But funny!
Sounds as if some voodoo is in order this week! :)
I can't think of anything witty to use with your words for Wednesday. My eyes are all teared up from laughing at that Little Golden Book!
All Elise wanted to do was scream, "Fuck off!" at the top of her lungs and shove the tiny preschoolers into the muddy embankment. Today was not the day to come at her with gooey hands demanding she "make Superman fly."
Instead she growled an irritable, "Shoo! Don't bother me!" as she navigated the throng of young humans, trying to ignore the garble of whining and enthusiasm as she navigated toward the teacher and her own troublemaker child. The dark look on Mrs. Phillips face said it all, Garret was at it again.
"What is it today?" Elise asked, taking Garret's shoulder in her hand and waiting for the tale of terror from his teacher.
"Your son is very creative Mrs. Billings." Mrs. Phillips grimaced, "Today he crafted voodoo dolls from construction paper and pipe cleaners before stabbing them quite brutally with his scissors and tearing their legs off by hand."
Elise sighed. She didn't have time for this shit. Her son was a hellion, just like half the class, but he was the hellion with the panache to get caught every single time he screwed around.
"We'll have to have another one of our talks when we get home," she frowned at Garret and tried to remember if there was any ice cream in the freezer at home, she needed it tonight.
"Well I hope your talk does some good this time, or Garret's going to end up spending the rest of the week at the safety desk without any craft supplies, I can tell you that much." Mrs. Phillips smiled a toothless, snakelike grin and Elise rolled her eyes.
"Of course Mrs. Phillips."
Yanking Garret toward the parking lot she sighed and winced at the tension in her shoulders and wondered if she could con her husband into picking up Garret the rest of the week. Until then, double chocolate chip cookie dough therapy was all she could think of-and possibly locking Garret in the chimpanzee enclosure at the zoo.
Some brilliant uses of the words. As always.
I suspect that I would like to lock Mrs Phillip in the chimp cage - while setting the chimps free.
I think they should've been 1st graders or kindergarten to be using scissors but having my first child only be a yearish old I had no clue! Had fun though :o) Thanks!
Love the contributions here!
Faith and Begorra!
Missed Wednesday words
A lot was in the brew
As I did my colonoscopy prep
And told my innards shoo.
Not for irritable bowl
Just for five year routine
I had to accept the bother
To see what could be seen.
Clip clip one little polyp
Then everything was fine
Though the headache that followed
Made me clinch and whine.
It would have been much easier
If the doctor and his crew
Could have only stuck a pin in me
In the practice of Voodoo.
Yet I did behave myself
And it appeared that luck
Got me off the operating table
Without one scream of Fuck!
Actually, I have a bunny that's behaving badly. I adore him, but he's the worst :-)
Who knew bunnies could be so bad!
Brilliant and your thoughtfully chosen words just about echo what's happening in my head. That's IT, I'm outta' here....
Gary
You'll fix any technical support issue they have? Would that be before or after you flip them the bird?
Great words to use, but alas poor Yorrick, I did see poor Horatio and he weren't no Hornblower.
Having said that, my state of mind is somewhere between a 5th of Bourbon and a jigger of formaldehyde, and quite frankly, dealing with Diaper Dan was too much for this gigolo.
You? Techie support? Really?
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
(shooting positive vibes over the 'net to ya)
Father Nature's Corner
I saw that book cover on Debra's blog and it cracked me up too.
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