Sometimes I wonder if the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it. - Mark Twain
Thursday, August 11, 2011
More reasons I'm glad I'm not dating
So one of my friends decided to try a free online dating site.
Some of the guys who messaged her include:
Guy #1. His message to my friend: "So I keep bubble wrap under my mattress, so when I'm doing it, it sounds like fireworks are going off! Isn't that cool?"
Guy #2-10 (estimates) - Can't write proper English. I don't mean ESL - I mean they would flunk first-grade spelling tests. No one wants to get wicha, y'know?
Guy #11. His message to my friend: "So FYI, I have the stomach flu. This doesn't mean you have to wrap yourself in foil, you can't get it through the computer."
Um. Needless to say she didn't write any of these guys back...stomach flu man sent her eight other messages in about 10 minutes after she blocked him.
"Why aren't you responding? Hmm, I guess I'll have to keep trying to figure it out and maybe I'll never know..."
That's OK. The fact that he doesn't know speaks volumes!
My friend did meet someone nice - so far. I'll be back with a full report soon.
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15 comments:
RK_ I sooo needed this laugh! Sorry I have been a Crappy friend. Real life stuff. But I did miss you and I hope to be back a little more often. You are one of a kind my friend, and I so appreciate you!
Hugs,
John
The key to meeting the right person is to get set up by an Indian couple. They just get it.
I only know I'm putting bubble wrap under the mattress.....
Yes - I found out how many crazy men there are out there when I did that online dating thing. :) Never again.
She found a nice guy, eh? Wait until she gets a load of his scheisse porn collection.
John: Happy to oblige! Hang in there.
WIGSF: I'll let her know ;)
GA: HAHAHA!
L: That's how I found my crazy man, actually. But there were many duds (offline) before that.
ABFTS: I'm just waiting for that shoe to drop.
I put firecrackers under the mattress so she can feel something.
hey, where did she go?
Again, I got that Cream song ramblin' thru my head:
"Strange brew, kills whats inside of you."
Darth: EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
G: HAHA! I love that song.
That fireworks guy was just trying to be funny, right? OMG!
Like you, I'm glad I'm not dating. Hope your amiga actually did find a genuinely nice guy...and that he stays a nice guy!
great post. I am also enjoying the wonderful perks of a single life.
following
I think those guys are HILARIOUS. In a creepy weird way. You know what? I just might try an online dating site sometime.
Ileana, yes, that was the intent...it was a reference to the bubble wrap guy
Ily: Apparently he was serious!
TB: LOL, does that include bubblewrap?
LDML: I think you have to be 18 to do that ;)
Darth: :)
The bubblewrap idea... I'm going to use this for an elaborate prank I think :) If you got time - http://themundanemadcap.blogspot.com/ I'm new so appreciate it if someone has a look :)
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