Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Sure, buy me a muffin. Who are you?

Is it me, or is way too much texting done for work these days?

As a general precaution I sometimes exchange cell phone numbers with people in case something comes up DOE.

But it's a bit weird to get a text like this, from an unknown number:

"Sorry about all the emailing you had to do to make sure I had the right time. Will make it up to you Friday. Will BUY YOU A MUFFIN!"
Really? How about telling me who the hell you are first? And...who capitalizes muffin? Ever?

It's just about event time, which means 1. I will have PMS that week, and 2. I start to get unreasonable requests.

I got this meal request from someone the other day:

Mind you...she has come to this event every year for the past 8 years and had no restrictions. Also, what is with the "no soda or chocolate or MSG?" Does she think we're going to force feed her soda and chocolate Chinese food? Just curious.

Update: Today, she called to un-RSVP. In lieu of attendance, she wants me to write up a synopsis of what each speaker says. Since we're going to have 300+ guests, that should be no problem, right?

Anything ridiculous going on in your lives?

22 comments:

A Beer for the Shower said...

So new cheese is okay? And how aged is aged? What's the cutoff age for acceptable cheese?

Uh, I'm representing the next Britney Spears and being bossed around by the guy that does her laundry and fetches her coffee. How's that for ridiculous?

Cperz said...

I always find this event planning of yours fascinating. I am sure that isn't the word you use to describe it. The gall of some people is just beyond description.

So the note writer person seems to have some rather stringent dietary restrictions, and expected you to plan her meal to her exact standards. Nothing pushy about that. Thank god she unRSVPed.

Why don't you send a handwritten list of reasons you won't be able to write a synopsis of the speakers.

You feel carpel tunnel coming on

Your favorite pen is lost

The speakers have evoked copyrights and you can't legally write down their words

You will be super busy making sure that all 300 meals are specifically made walnut, chocolate, MSG, tomato and aged cheese free.

Gosh, I wish I was involved with this event so I could request being brought in, in the exact manner of Cleopatra. I don't know what that cool stretcher thing is that she got carried in on but I want one just like it.





Abby said...

I just gotta say, people who send in long lists of "things to not make me eat" get on my nerves. If it's there, and you can't eat it, just DON'T EAT IT.

Enjoy the PMS...er... event!

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Does that demanding attendee think you're her personal secretary? The gall of some people!

Birdie said...

Just as I opened your post my daughter sent me a text to say she is going out. She was downstairs.
I yelled out, "Really?" then she came up and said goodbye the way we did in the 80's and gave me a hug.

Elephant's Child said...

Sigh. I have been at LL all day and get in to read this. Goodness you have to deal with some oxygen thieves. And imbeciles. And self important princesses. I am in awe at your patience.
And have less than none left myself tonight. The full moon callers were out in force. ( And I have no idea what phase the moon is in.)

Granny Annie said...

I am guilty of sending a text to someone I know and have their phone number and think they will know who I am. If we have each others number why doesn't my name come up in their text? However I have been told they didn't' answer because they didn't know the text was from me. It is an honest mistake but I didn't send you muffin Muffin:-)

Charles Gramlich said...

Write up a synopsis. Geeze. I get students at times who want me to write up my notes for them.

HBF said...

Ridiculous would be me! My mood is so topsy turvy it's absolutely redonkulous. I asked the hubs, "How do you make sense of how crazy I was this afternoon and then us all lovey-dovey this evening?" He replied, as if it were the simplest thing, "Gotta put it behind me and move on, that's not what's going on now so I don't have to worry about it." expressive hand waggle. *sigh*

Hope you enjoy your next muffin, wherever it may come from ;)

Anonymous said...

I suggest the following synopsis....."Good evening. Tells joke. Blah Blah Blah.... Thank you and goodnight" (Limited edition CD available in exchange for humongous donation)

Jono said...

No chocolate? Seriously? Do you even WANT to know this obnoxious person? Have her send one of "her people" to take notes.

lotta joy said...

If I can't eat something, I don't demand that it not be available for others to eat. Who am I kidding. I'll eat anything that hasn't been sat on. But still....

G. B. Miller said...

Well....you already know the weird stuff going on my life, but here's a smidgen more.

Daughter had her skating test the other day and failed. But the clincher is this: The judges failed everyone except two. They even failed a seven year old, which as most people in the sport know, you never want to fail a child that young 'cause you want them to maintain interest in the sport.

Father Nature's Corner

OldLady Of The Hills said...

It sounds like you serve a meal at this event. She should bring her own!!! I mean, are you supposed to change your whole menu to suit her needs? I will never understand people! It's great she is not coming---just a little less for you to worry about. OY!Breath deeply, my dear.....And as Teddy R. said, "Carry A Big Stick"......!

Susan English Mason said...


But the world DOES revolve around HER, doesn't it? I am sorry I have not visited for a long time. I have missed your humor!

Lynn said...

Nothing quite as whacky as that!

My sister found some homemade potholders that she is convinced our cousin's children made, so she texted her a photo of them and asked her if they made them. Cousin typed back, "First of all - who IS this?" I told my sis that cousin would have had to put her name and cell number in her contact info, or her name wouldn't come up. So funny.

Lee said...

Muffin in caps could be a code...hmmmmmmm... :)

Claire said...

Aged cheese? What the eff? This person sounds like a delight and a half, although I am now fascinated by soda and chocolate Chinese food...

CraveCute said...

To the person who Un-RSVP'd but wants you to write a synopsis; what nerve! Can't you just reply with your own list? My reply to that person would be.... "Uhh, NO!"

River said...

I don't think I've been here before, but I'm here now. I read at EC's that you will be providing the word selection for Words for Wednesday this month. Looking forward to the challenge.

Lisa said...

She has migraines and someone has told her this diet helps. Good luck with that.

Kerry said...

Well, shucks, and there you were about to serve pizza, coke, and brownies.