Tuesday, July 03, 2007

From a guest blogger inspired by a real live author!

What she would like to e-mail him, but diplomatically did not, is below, for all to see and (hopefully) draw inspiration from. By the way, she's being kind. And his wife is a huge pain in the ass, too. They probably sit at home and argue about what to get annoyed about and how to annoy others. But that's just a guess.

Dear Author,

I received the copy you were complaining about. Unfortunately, there is nothing more that we can do for you. If you'd like to be an asshole about this, that is your problem and I just wanted to let you know that any sort of respect I had for you will be blown out of the water which is too bad because I originally thought you were a decent writer which is a situation that is extremely rare at my job and you have already completely destroyed any respect I had for you as a person due to your whiny compulsiveness but now even your turns of phrase and clever alliteration seem just like another remnant of your pretentious self centeredness instead of a glimmer of intelligence or talent so I hope you decide to take the high road but I highly doubt this is likely so until I receive your most likely dick-ish and smarmy reply, have a lovely day and a happy 4th and remember not to let a firework poke your eye out.

All the best,

Ann Oyed

1 comment:

Darth Weasel said...

too funny. sometimes I wish I did not have a filter between my brain an my mouth because there are a lot of things like this I would LOVE to say