Wednesday, April 08, 2015

Stupid, stupid, everywhere

One of my events was today. It was great, mainly because the keynote was the best I've ever had, but as you know, all greatness in my world must be preceded by bunches of stupid.

And I find myself wanting to bonk my head on my desk and ask, "Is it just me?"

Here's a snippet of this event's nonsense.

Question #1
From a past-the-deadline RSVP, a few days before the event: "Do we know who the speaker is yet?"

No. I thought I'd just pull someone from the audience to volunteer.
Question #2
Asked today at my event, about an upcoming event: "Why don't you bring wheelchairs to the event, like in case my parents get tired and want to be pushed around?"

Right - we're not a nonprofit group, we're a hospital supply company for lazy people. For that matter, why don't we bring volunteers to push them?
Act of rudeness
My volunteer's mom gave him a ride to the event. When they showed up half an hour late, the job he was scheduled for was already done. I explained this and asked if something had come up. Her reply: "I had to take my morning walk."

I'd have been more sympathetic if you had told me you had to take your morning shit.

Act of complete cluelessness
A question from someone who showed up with no RSVP: "Where is the table of company X? I wanted to sit close to that table."

It's good to want things. It's also good to pull your head out of your ass once in awhile.

16 comments:

Elephant's Child said...

I suspect it is a very good thing that you don't have your avatar's gun.
Somedays the gene pool is very, very shallow and scum filled isn't it?

Blogoratti said...

Well that didn't end as planned...obviously!

Rock Chef said...

Well, if you are getting into supplying stuff "just in case"...

Have an ambulance parked outside?

Have a SWAT team on call?

Have a side room full of hookers?

Debra She Who Seeks said...

I laughed at all of these but especially the morning shit one!

Lynn said...

People are amazing, aren't they?

Granny Annie said...

Maybe she fell into a well on her walk.....

Charles Gramlich said...

Another day of mind boggling!

Dexter Klemperer said...

Giver her the benefit of the doubt, maybe her morning walk was delayed by her morning shit.

CraveCute said...

All I can say is hahahhahaha! I'm sorry you had to deal with these people. But hilarious material!

Birdie said...

The wheelchair reminds me of the newest episode of Derek. Kev's dad gets pushed around in a wheelbarrow. The government won't supply a wheelchair because there is nothing wrong with him. He is just lazy.
If you haven't seen the episode I recommend it! It is pee your pants funny.

Vanessa Morgan said...

My new excuse for EVERYTHING from now on will be: "I had to take my morning walk." I cracked up laughing when I read that :)

Abby said...

I second that last cat's comment

A Beer for the Shower said...

You mean this volunteer thing isn't all about me? But what if I need to rest in a wheelchair after my morning walk? I think that's a LITTLE bit more important than your stupid nonprofit.

(Also, we e-mailed you. Look for it)

Lee said...

Aaaaarrrrrrrggggghhhhhh! What else can I do than scream out..."Aaaaarrrrrrgggghhhhhh!?

Claire said...

Oh my goodness. You must have the patience of a saint!

klahanie said...

Oh my, how I can relate to such a fiasco. With that, the dog is about to take me for a walk....

Take good care and have a peaceful weekend.

Penny's alleged human,

Gary :)